Grades Don’t Buy Happiness
Young women hold in their hands literally a world of colorful possibilities, perhaps unprecedented, for exciting, one-of-a-kind lives.
But how many of your friends do you see moving in that direction? How about you? Why do we throw away the opportunity for remarkable lives?
There are lots of reasons to choose to play it safe – to choose to be a zoo assistant instead of an oceanographer, a day care teacher instead of a psychologist, a follower instead of a leader. Part of it is the subtle message, conveyed more to girls than to boys, not to dream too big.
But I find with many women that another huge part of it is that we’re not taught how to take on and walk through tough challenges. Couple that with the clamor for a 4.0, and you’ll witness stretch goals being replaced with sure things.
It used to be that the pressure for grades began at age six. That was the point at which the educational system warped children’s natural curiosity,
Read MoreThe Best To-Do List Ever!
I don’t think of organization as a task — although it does involve some set-up and maintenance. I think of it as peace of mind. Having a hundred little (and big) tasks free-floating around in your mind — and having to keep thinking about them so you don’t forget — is a recipe for anxiety and overwhelm. It feels like a big, out-of-control swirl.
The great news is it’s sooooo easy to fix!
Here’s my secret weapon:
This little gem does everything you need to keep your life in order. (And I should say here, I do not have any affiliate arrangement with Dextronet; I’m just a true fan of this product.)
You can do a lot of neat things with this software, but here are the top three functions:
- Create a series of separate lists — one for each of your classes — and you might also have a list for college or internship applications, your job, shopping — any area of your life that is buzzing with tasks and/or creative ideas. Add an icon to each list to give it a unique look.
- You can add tasks to each list, categorize and prioritize them, including adding a due date. (You can also add detailed notes to any task and even upload associated documents.)
- By clicking on View — All Lists, and then go to the funnel icon on the toolbar and choosing the filters, you can create a list of today’s tasks. If you only want to see the tasks you’ve marked as highest priority, the software will pull each item from every one of your lists that is so designated and display them on one screen. You can then sort this short list by due date. Presto! Your day’s work is in front of you.
That last feature is the key to success. It’s a cinch to add tasks, thoughts and ideas to any one of your lists any time something occurs to you; in fact, I leave my list open on my desktop the whole time I’m working. But — it’s impossible to focus and get anything done if you’re looking at a list of 100 items. By prioritizing and adding due dates, you can see in front of you only the tasks that you need to do today — or the ones that are due between now and next Friday — whatever you decide.
So you can save your sanity in two ways.
First, all that stuff that’s buzzing around in your brain threatening to cause a meltdown can be placed on appropriate lists. Your brain can rest. One by one, the things you just can’t afford to forget can be released from your brain onto your list.
Second, when you open up your laptop, you’ll see in front of you just exactly what you need to do right now. You’ll find yourself knocking things out right and left — and when you place that satisfying check beside the completed items, they’ll be archived for you and removed from view. Read pgs. 251-265 for biology; complete outline for essay for English; get the oil changed on the car; make a call to the members of your joint project group — zip, zip zip. It’s a great feeling.
Sound good? There’s a free trial version. Once you download it, you can switch it from the “Professional” version to “Standard” which is all you’ll need. There’s even a freebie — the “Lite” version (scroll all the way down and click on the small download link in the bottom right-hand corner), but it lacks the filtering ability that lets you create a single list, pulled from all of your lists, of what you need to do today. I do think that’s a crucial feature. So, if you need a tool that allows multiple lists, creates a consolidated list based on tasks you’ve prioritized, and costs nothing, email me at f r a n h e n d r i c k AT m y c o a c h f r a n DOT c o m, and I’ll send you my own version in Excel, called the Next-Up list.
Once you get this system in place, you’ll feel unbeatable, you’ll actually have more free time — and I’m willing to bet you’ll sleep better too!
COMING SOON: Power up your productivity with my e-course on Getting Organized and Getting Stuff Done! I’ll work with you one-on-one to help you create your Success Map and the master list that will take you where you want to go.
Read MoreCreate a Map to Your Success
How do you get where you’re going?
First you decide where you want to go! Then you find a map that will take you there.
But once you take out the map, you find that there are many ways to get to the same place. There’s the fastest way, the most direct way – and those two are not always the same. There’s the scenic back roads way or the interstate route, not to mention the zigzag path where you stop at all kinds of cool places along the way.
You’ve got hundreds of choices and opportunities open to you this year. Your “destination” might
Read MoreFinding Your Path – Part 2
Okay – so you’ve got a boatload of new challenges this year, whether you’re a senior in high school working out what’s next or a freshman in college.
Here’s what I’d like you to do:
- Make a worry list. Sketch out a quick list of the challenges you’re facing – the ones that have you stumped, lost or stuck.
- Hide it. Put your list aside where you can’t see it for the moment.
- Create a gentle space. Plan a half hour that you can have all to yourself, a time when you’re free to think and imagine. Create a space that encourages you to expand into your thoughts. Maybe it’s a park bench, maybe it’s the breakfast room. You might curl up on the sofa with your laptop, or it might be more your style to go to a really nice book store to choose the perfect journal, a place of honor for the thoughts that you will place in it.
- Dare to imagine. Begin a post entitled, “Ideal Day.” This will help you create a larger context.
Tough Schools Require Emotional Stamina
Counselors often advise students to apply for a couple of schools that are a little out of their reach, a couple that they’re likely to be accepted by, and one or two “back-up” schools. But is it clearly best to go to the “stretch” school if you’re accepted? Does your ultimate success require it?
If you head for the toughest school that will accept you, you’ll find yourself in class with the others who are at or above your own ability level. On the one hand, that’s truly a great thing. Being surrounded by people who challenge you is an environment where phenomenal learning can take place. If that’s exciting to you, go for it!
However, for some students, being challenged at that level is terrifying enough to
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